lazy post.

Here's a good article on babywearing your adopted (foster) child.

Things I Learned at Court:

1. No one does their jobs very well. For whatever reason (under staffed, over worked, underpaid, under motivated. . .) children really are just shuffled through the system.

2. CPS caseworkers need more legal training and to be held to higher standards. (and yes, I believe they should be paid way more and have smaller caseloads. I get that.)

3. Information gets lost in the shuffle. We will make every effort to attend every hearing for every child in our care from here on out.

4. Don't just trust that things were done well even from well intended agencies. Our home study, that has now been submitted to the court, has mistakes. I didn't think to ask to read the final copy in the fall and had just trusted that the corrections that we had discussed with our agency had been made. No doubtunintentional, but there are still mistakes that I'm not comfortable with.

5. Bring something to read.

Blessed

I woke up feeling like Eric and I are walking in the land of the uncertain-- babies, jobs, grad school, houses. . . Then Brett Dennen reminded me that I'm blessed.

breakfast and blogging

So my new goal is to blog every Tuesday and Friday. This little blog here is good for me- the things I write here, are for your information (and if you're considering becoming a foster parent- hopefully your encouragement!) but really this blog is cheaper than therapy*. Currently, I'm sitting at a coffee shop down the street from my house enjoying a superbly made latte, a ham and cheese croissant, and free wifi. Delight!

We've received two placement calls in the past couple of weeks. Both were emergency placements of 3 month old baby girls. We missed the first call, so there was no decision to be made, but the second call was so hard! She was a three month, african american, baby girl- her mom had tested positive for drugs and has had her rights terminated to 3 older children. Because we ultimately hope to adopt through this process- she was a perfect match! Except. . .that we have a six month old at home, are trying to buy a house, have two sports seasons left for Eric, grad school, and 9 weeks of teaching. . .In the end we decided that the added stress of another tiny baby would not be best for us individually or as a family. I spent the next day wondering if we did the right thing-- wondering if she was supposed to be our baby and we turned her away-- wondering and fearing the day that Aaron returns to his biological family--wondering how long our hearts will hold out in this process, but in the end (after a few tears) I know we did the right thing; our lives are wonderfully full and our babies will come to us in due time. For now, we're a happy family of 3- Mama, Daddy, and Boogs.

*Therapy is good and I have a wonderful counselor too.

month six.

Aaron turned six months old on Sunday. I can't believe how the time is flying and can't even begin to describe how he's changed our lives and moved in to our hearts. He's rolling over, sleeping through the night, and eating solid foods. He uses his voice to communicate- often times quite loudly! and loves going to school. He had his first Christmas, went to his first Rodeo, and has been on several vacations. He's licked a popsicle and been licked by a puppy. He has two teeth, sits in a shopping cart, and plays with toys. These past six months have been the most amazing, challenging, delightful months of our lives. There is no doubt- we are in love.

He still sees his birth mom weekly. Mostly, the visits go well. Eric and I talk often of the day that he may return to her. Her next court date is April 6th. We will be in attendance, but know little of what to expect. It'll be good to know first hand what the judge is saying and know where we stand. It's not a competition, but it sometimes feels that way.

if you could see me now. . .

growing boy!