1:06 a.m.

I've been trying to figure out where to start our story. There's so many things I'd like to tell you- so many details, so many people, so many thoughts, so many stories. . .but it's 1:06- nay, 1:07 a.m. and all I can tell you tonight is where we are now.

I've just laid our baby boy down- for about the 5th time tonight. He's having gas/growing/only want to be held issues. I waver between begging him to fall asleep and wanting to hold him in my arms forever. He's beautiful- seriously. He's happy (mostly) and easy (mostly). He's strong and clever and silly. He loves to be loved and he's happiest when he's sleeping close to heart. He's not ours biologically- and only our foster son legally. But he is ours today- and that's all that matters.